Posted in DemEd in Real LifePhilosophy of EducationParenting on Jan 21, 2010 - 01:31 AM
Have I really been doing it all along?I first heard about unschooling when I was doing research on homeschooling my daughter. I received The Unschooling Handbook for Christmas (yes, I ordered it myself) and as I make my way through it, I'm quickly realizing that I've been pretty much unschooling my little girl since...well, birth.
Don't we all use our kids' cues to play what they want to play with, talk about what they want to talk about, and that sort of thing? How many times have you switched a toy when your ten-month-old refused to play with the one you've given her? How many times have you let your child pick out his or her own books, or craft projects to work on, or games to play, or even a video to rent?
I used to make a list in my planner with my daughter of five things she wanted to do that day just so she could have some say in what we did as a family. Nowadays I just let her play with what interests her, joining in when she invites me (okay, so sometimes I just have to color too, particularly when it's using markers on balloons) and occasionally offering to do something new and interesting. She's pretty creative with what she comes up with, from play dough to dress up, cooking ("Mama, can we make spaghetti?") to helping with chores, playing in glitter to silently "reading" animal books.
Is that really it? Please correct me if I'm oversimplifying; I certainly don't mean to do that.
I just suddenly feel a little more at ease. How natural this process seems... How relaxed and cozy and just...us. This is pretty much what I did with my sisters growing up as I cared for them as well. Were they partly unschooled? Well, we all attended public school, so I suppose not... but if that's what the philosophy means, we all--including me, from my own mother--definitely got a taste of it.
Now, I was an education major, and I do enjoy planning out activities sometimes. One of my favorite things to do as a teenager was group the neighborhood kids (or the kids in the classes I teacher aided in, or that I babysat, or just my sisters) and teach them a lesson about anything--a book I was into, first aid I learned from Red Cross camp, painting, whatever. Sometimes I made posters or handouts to color, or occasionally food that went with the theme, but usually it was just us goofing around and learning together--no lesson plans or anything like that, just...having fun.
I can still do activities like that if I choose to "unschool," right? Every homeschooling parent uses his or her own unique method, choosing what works best; so if I want to do this sort of thing occasionally and my daughter goes for it, I think I'd still be staying true to the ideals of democratic education. After all, I'm just as much a kid at heart as she is sometimes, and if I want to dress up and paint my face to teach her about stranger safety (which I actually did as part of my final exam at the camp I mentioned earlier), I think I'm okay doing that.
Tags for this entry:
self-directed learning,
youth-adult relationships,
play,
homeschooling and unschooling,
natural learning
comments
You’re right Melia—and for what reason? To cram in so much information that many will not use—and only forget after being tested—while making them miserable, bored, even ashamed? It just doesn’t make sense. Of course, it’s harder when you’re trying to deal with thirty growing kids with hormones and plenty of problems of their own, but there are so many things we could keep in from kindergarten that would make things so much better.
I always thought that it wasn’t very fair that I succeeded in school—by societal standards, anyway—while my husband and youngest sister didn’t so much, only because I have a linguistic learning style. Imagine if these two would’ve had classes that took their strengths—tactile and interpersonal, respectively—into consideration… They would both be different people today, encouraged and supported rather than made to feel like failures.
Why aren’t there more progressive high schools? I know of one in the entire St. Louis area, though it’s still got that “competitive edge.” I’m sure there have to be others, right?
I haven’t read any of Llewellyn’s books yet but they’re all on my wishlist. I’m slowly making my way buying used ones when I can, as our library has a pretty limited selection. I’m thinking we may have to get Sage a St. Louis county library card, or something where she can check out books from larger libraries than the one in our area (which is still a good library with great programs, don’t get me wrong; just a smaller selection than I’d like).
on Jan 21, 2010 - 01:18 PM
Sage is a lucky girl, and you make motherhood look so fun and appealing, Sara. I love that the unschooling approach really is so organic—you let the kids have a say in what they want to do and what they want to learn, and it naturally progresses from there. I remember doing that as a kid all the time. Well, I want to rollerskate for an hour and then I want to write a play with my friends and perform it for the neighborhood and then I want to read a book about time travel… When was the last time we allowed ourselves that freedom as adults or even teenagers?
I agree that it is such a pity that we think of this creative exploration as a childhood thing and we lose it as we grow older (and more structured and stressed out). Sara, are you planning to homeschool/unschool Sage all the way through high school or are you playing it by ear at this point?
on Jan 21, 2010 - 03:38 PM
I appreciate that Gill! I’m hoping to foster a lifelong love of learning with Sage no matter her abilities or interests, prep her to eventually leave me on her own wings (sniff!) and keep her spirit nice and intact.
So far the plan is to continue homeschooling through high school, maybe let her enroll in community college early if she wants or go volunteer after she finishes or whatever. I’ve been researching on making our own diploma when we get there. But yeah, we’ll pretty much be playing it by ear. 
on Jan 21, 2010 - 06:52 PM
You’d think that with the headway that Howard Gardner made with the Multiple Intelligences, traditional classrooms would look different by now. I remember that we did some Multiple Intelligences quizzes growing up, but that a token acknowledgement of different learning styles didn’t affect classroom operations much.
I do know of some progressive high schools—in fact, many are in AERO’s Directory of Democratic Schools. I’d say that the majority are independent/private so they can have the freedom to operate as they wish, but there are a few public ones, like Jefferson County Open School.
on Jan 21, 2010 - 07:46 PM
I remember a focus on multiple intelligences too… but I think the majority of what I learned was when I was in training to be a tutor on campus, not in the teaching program itself. Weird, right?
on Jan 22, 2010 - 12:52 AM
Every time I read your posts, I think how lucky Sage is!
I find that schools, even more traditional ones, tend to let kids explore and ask questions and be creative when they’re young. But as the kids move through the grades, the classes get progressively more structured and didactic, so by the time people become adults they’ve lost touch with their imagination and playfulness.
Even within the democratic education world, where are the Montessori high schools? The progressive schools I’ve visited tend to be in the lower grades, K-5 or K-8.
Have you read The Teenage Liberation Handbook by Grace Llewellyn?
on Jan 21, 2010 - 12:50 PM